Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Break Time

Baklava, it's what's for break!

2008Dec09 misc 001

Sunday, November 30, 2008

I Get E-Mail!

Another one. Senator Mr. Jerry wants me to show up in South Carolina to get my money, the amount of which is not specified. Not that I would ever go to South Carolina, nice as it might be, as I don't travel well. Heck, I couldn't bestir myself to travel across the street for a hundred bucks, I am just THAT slack!

From: "Senator Jerry Gana"
Subject: Final Settlement of Your Payment.
Date: Sat, 29 Nov 2008 11:21:14 -0800

Dear Contractor,

Following the meeting held with the Presidency on the issue of foreign contract payments, a consensus was reached with the Presidency about the activities of some officials of the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN) who are in the habit of diverting contractors payment and frustrating them by imposing unnecessary charges on them, making it difficult for these contractors to receive their long overdue payments. All the above allegations levelled against CBN consequently compelled the Presidency to stop the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN) from further managing contractors payment.


This development has been reported to the Presidency, who expressed his dissatisfaction over these actions as those were ment to tarnish the image of our beloved country. The Presidency has therefore given instruction that all foreign contractors should henceforth, stop going through the CBN officials to pursue their contract claim. Any contractor going through the CBN is doing that at his or her own risk.


The Presidency after an in-depth and pain staking study of your financial and psychological predicament in receiving your fund in the last few years, hereby this day resolved that an immediate and unconditional payment release be effected to you via our Payment Centre in South Carolina, U.S.A.


This decision is based on memorandum of understanding, signed with the above mentioned, and we in our capacity as professionals, have been mandated and empowered by the Presidency to solely handle all foreign contractual payments and other external debt servicing exercise.
Do reconfirm your status, acceptability and willingness to be in South Carolina, U.S.A for your claim as per advised.

We urge you to co-operate with us in order to ensure a quick and final settlement of your payment.


We regret any inconveniences you may have experienced in the past while trying to receive your contract proceeds.

Yours faithfully,

Mr. Jerry Gana
Chairman
.
Contract Review Panel

E:jerry.gana@senate.uk.tt

So which is it, "Senator", or "Mister", Jerry, eh? And the Nigerian Senate uses a Trinidad and Tobago e-mail host? Lame-O, Jerry, lame-oh! Or, to use a word that apparently no one else has ever used, MOBUS LAME-O!!

Thursday, November 20, 2008

I Get E-Mail!

Personally, I find the lack of a degree is holding me back. Since these yahoos have a serious problem with spelling, etc., why should I pay THEM money for a fake diploma, when I can go to the Magic Mill Diploma Generator and make my own?

Date: Thu, 20 Nov 2008 09:33:28 -0700
From: "Stephani Jong" s_jong_oj@iprolink.ch
Subject: Low education? now you can BUY Dip1oma/Degree/MasteerMBA at cheap dax eh0

Would you like to:
Increase Your Salary?
Increase Your Ability to find other work?
Increase Your Marketability?
Increase Your Desirability?

Please call: 1-718-989-5740 [Inside USA]
+1-718-989-5740 [Outside USA]

is an University Degree/Dip1oma holding you back?
Kindly call us To inquire about Our degree programs.

Whether you Are seeking a Diploma, Bacheelor, M B A/ P h D
We can Provide you credentials to get you Better Career
No Study, Exam, test, or courseworks required

Please call: 1-718-989-5740 [Inside USA]
+1-718-989-5740 [Outside USA]

Please leave us your "Name, country & phone no. with Countrycode"

Our staff will call tou back soon

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

I Get E-Mail!

Another stupid email scam. Unbelievable!

Reply-To: monastic1@live.com
From: "Monastic Financial Security Company S.L" yb@yb.com.tw
Subject: Re: Your Winning Payment
Date: Mon, 17 Nov 2008 23:16:25 -0800

I am Joe Wright Managing Director, Corporate Services Division and Head of Swift Transfer Unit of Monastic Financial Security Company S.L, London UK. We wish to inform you that your winning fund was deposited in our vault.

That You were among the winners of an INTERNATIONAL PROMOTION PROGRAM. Participants were selected through a computer ballot system drawn from 2,500,000 email addresses of individuals and companies from all part of the world.

We are pleased to inform you that we have verified every aspect of your winning payment of US$3,000, 000, 00 and have submitted a written report to the Lottery Team and also validated your Winning payment and shall commence transfer of payment upon receiving your confirmation because there are mixed up in your payment details.

PLEASE CLARIFY THE FOLLOWING INFORMATION

1. Did you at any point transfer your claim to one Mr. Fernandez Gomez whose bank name and account number is written below, to claim and receive the payment on your behalf?

2. His claim was backed with a "Deed of Agreement" in his favor thereby indicating the fund destination to the following account. Account name Mr. Fernandez Gomez, Bank name: H. S. B.C
3. Account No 6179172979 You are required to as a matter of urgency confirm the legitimacy of the above claim and the reason for such change.

Please confirm to us immediately via as any delay could result to the call back of the accrued interest payment to the treasury account.

We await your response

Yours Sincerely,
Mr. Joe wright
For: Monastic Financial Security Company S.L,
London UK

Phone:+44 703 197 1997
Fax: +44 871 503 2596
E-mail: monastic1@live.com


I am intrigued by the "via" in the last paragraph. "Via" what, I ask?
And just who is this "Fernandez Gomz" that is trying to make off with MY MONEY?

Saturday, November 15, 2008

I Get E-Mail!

My son Kelvin sent me this business opportunity! Wow, this could be the one!!

From: "Kelvin Andrews" enquiries_3@azet.sk
Subject: Western Union payment to your acc
Date: Sat, 15 Nov 2008 06:26:03 +0100

Dear Mom & Dad,

This is a real business opportunity for anyone (within the US and Minors)
with a flexible schedule and transportation at the extreme. I need
collection agents for my international import / export business. This is a
real second income opportunity. Great for work at home moms and dads! Hours
vary between 2-10 hours a week. Depends on our need in your area. Everyone
who is accepted will be given trial assignments. Once you have proven that
you enjoy the work and want to continue the volume of collections and amount
you can earn will increase gradually.

Once you are accepted we will have our clients pay you on our behalf. You
will pick up payments for the company nearly every day per our instructions.
You will keep 10% of all collections as your commission for your work. The
balance will be sent to our suppliers per our instructions to you.

Requirements:

1. Honesty and Integrity--You are handling company funds.

2. Flexibility and Commitment. You need to be available when needed.

3. Attention to detail and ability to follow instructions.

4. Transportation to Pick up Payments and make Payment to Suppliers.

5. Available 7 days a week if needed.

6. Must have computer with Internet access.

7. Must be able to communicate via email and on the phone in English. Income
potential up to $500 a week or more once you have proven you are a
trustworthy representative who can handle your assignments in a timely
manner. If you are interested send an email explaining your qualifications
and why you think this second income opportunity is right for you.

8. If you have a bank account with any of customer friendly banks in the USA,UK,Canada and Australia will be
a added advantage.


Hurry! We have several openings worldwide and will fill these positions in
the next seven days. Every email will be answered. Following a phone
interview, if you are accepted, you must be ready to work immediately.

Note this is not a salaried position with benefits. Your 10% commission is
your pay. The volume of collections determines your earnings. Your earning
potential is based on performance. We do not discriminate on race, color or
religion. If you have a good work ethic you will do well with our company.

Sincerely,

Kelvin Andrews.
+44 703 594 9160

VP Human Relations International Division
Blue Tie Global Resources International


Oh, wait, I don't HAVE a son named Kelvin. Well, maybe the next email will pan out!

Crud, I deleted it already. Well, it WOULD have been funny. I'll have to try it again, later. There's always more spam!

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

I Get E-Mail!

So the Brit's National Lottery sends out notices from an ".edu" TLD?
With the word "spam" in the subject line?
Yeah, I BELIEVE!


SUBJECT: [spam] To file for claim
FROM: "miller@ucc.edu"

To file for claim
The National Lottery
P O Box 1010
Liverpool, L70 1NL
UNITED KINGDOM

(Customer Services)
Ref: UK/9420X2/90
Batch: 08005/ZY369
To avoid your winning prize been auto cancelled, do not reply to this Email send all your replies directly to your assigned Fiduciary Agent ( mr.aaronjackson@hotmail.com)
RE: BONUS LOTTERY E-MAIL PROMOTION PRIZE AWARDS WINNING NOTIFICATION
We are pleased to notify you that The Uk National Promo Draw is don annually and lucky winners
Email address are selected randomly from Millions of World Wide Emails address, and your Email
address has been selected as one of the 7th lucky winners with E -ticket Number: 123418302 188,
Serial Number : 5368/02, Batch Number: R3/A312-59, Reference Number: LSUK/2031/8161/06 and
Lucky Numbers: 07. 10, 22, 24, 34, 44, (18 Bonus Ball), which is creditted to a total sum of
£1,200,000 (ONE MILLION AND TWO HUNDRED THOUSAND POUNDS STERLING) .This is from a total cash
prize of £7,200,000 GBP shared amongst the first Three (3) lucky winners in this category i.e.
Match 5 plus bonus. thousands of websites submits thier users emails address to us, in order
to enter their users in our annual UK National Lottery Promo.
To file for claim, you are required to provide us with the information below
for verification, including your below winning information:
E -ticket Number: 123418302 188
Serial Number : 5368/02
Batch Number: R3/A312-59
Reference Number: LSUK/2031/8161/06
Lucky Numbers: 4, 8, 4, 6, 0, 4, 6
Full Name:
Mailing address:
Permanent house address:
Country of resident:
Phone Number
:
Age:
Marital Status:
Sex:
Occupation:
Annual Income:
E -ticket Number:
Serial Number :
Batch Number:
Reference Number:
Lucky Numbers:
Please send the above of your information to your assigned UK National Lottery Fiduciary Agent using
the following contact information
=========================================
Name: Mr.Aaron Jackson.
Email: mr.aaronjackson@hotmail.com
=========================================
CONGRATULATIONS!!!
At your disposal, we remain.
Very Truly Yours,
Miller Clinton
Copyright 1994-2008 The UK National Lottery Inc.
All rights reserved. Terms of Service - Guideline

I STILL don't get how these guys can spell "ficuciary", I mean "fiduciary", correctly, and then spell "their" as "thier"!! Not to mention the random letter "s" inserted here and there... Spell check, bebe! Use it!

Friday, October 24, 2008

I Get E-Mail!

Besides all the stupid PediPaws spam I get, which I will NEVER buy, just on principle, I occasionally get a business proposition. This has got to be one of LAMEST I've ever received!

Subject: EMAIL
From: JOSEPH POON josephpoon_3@yahoo.com.hk

Good Day,
I have a business of US$22.4million for you.Please contact me for details.
Joseph Poon

Come ON, Joe, put a little effort into it!

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

I Get E-Mail!

TWO completely independent people sent me this lottery-winning email, so it MUST be true!

Email #1


WINNING NOTIFICATION
"Geller, Callard L"

Company No. 02949433
SERIAL NUMBER: 5368/02
TICKET NUMBER: 8603775966738
Batch Number: 074/05/ZY369
Ref Number: UK/9420X/05

WINNING NOTIFICATION

We are pleased to inform you of the final announcement that you are
one of our beginning of the year winners of the UNITED KINGDOM ONLINE

PROMO AWARDS, held on 28th sep ,2008. You have won for your self a total sum of
£1,200,000 POUNDS STERLING.

However, no tickets were sold but all email addresses were assigned to
different ticket numbers for representation and privacy.The selection
process was

carried out through random selection in our computerized email selection
machine(TOPAZ) from a database of over 250,000 email addresses drawn from
all the continents of the world.

Please you are adviced to complete the form and send it immediately to
0Aour from the designated bank.

Fill the below information's and send to the fiduciary agent for your
Claims verification:
FILL THE CLAIMS FORM BELOW AND SEND
TO OUR CLAIMS AGENT FOR VERIFICATION
1. Full Names:
2. Address:
3. Age:
4. Sex:
5. Marital Status:
6. Occupation:
7. Phone numbers:
8. Country:

Name: Mr. Morrison Bonnie

e-mail: Morrison218Bonnie@live.com

Tell-+447024084588

Yours Truly,
Co-ordinator(Online Promo Programme)

Email #2


Contact Mr. Morrison Bonnie
"Durr, Kristin"

Company No. 02949433
SERIAL NUMBER: 5368/02
TICKET NUMBER: 8603775966738
Batch Number: 074/05/ZY369
Ref Number: UK/9420X/05

WINNING NOTIFICATION

We are pleased to inform you of the final announcement that you are
one of our beginning of the year winners of the UNITED KINGDOM ONLINE

PROMO AWARDS
, held on 28th sep ,2008. You have won for your self a total sum of
£1,200,000 POUNDS STERLING.

However, no tickets were sold but all email addresses were assigned to
different ticket numbers for representation and privacy.The selection
process was

carried out through random selection in our computerized email selection
machine(TOPAZ) from a database of over 250,000 email addresses drawn from
all the continents of the world.

Please you are adviced to complete the form and send it immediately to
0Aour from the designated bank.

Fill the below information’s and send to the fiduciary agent for your
Claims verification:
FILL THE CLAIMS FORM BELOW AND SEND
TO OUR CLAIMS AGENT FOR VERIFICATION
1. Full Names:
2. Address:
3. Age:
4. Sex:
5. Marital Status:
6. Occupation:
7. Phone numbers:
8. Country:

Name: Mr. Morrison Bonnie

e-mail: Morrison218Bonnie@live.com

Tell-+447024084588

Yours Truly,
Co-ordinator(Online Promo Programme)


Wow, my fears are allayed, NO TICKETS were sold, only email addresses were used to pick da weiners. Ah, yes, using TOPAZ machine, I see. Why never SAPPHIRE? Not to mention Merlin, Arthur, Galahad, Vyvyan, Lancelot, Garnet, Opal, Amethyst, Moonstone, Pearl. And then there is poor, retired, Guinevere...

By the by, the UK National Lottery has a page about email scams...

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

I Get E-Mail!

I just love the name "Precious". I recall a fellow in Basic Training who's back-home nickname turned out to be "Precious". Wasn't that fun when the D.I. discovered that! Guess what his military nickname became?

Back to the email, hey, I didn't know they had the intarwebs in refugee camps! What else do they have, running hot and cold water?



FROM MISS PRECIOUS DEBA
NICLA REFUGEE CAMP,
Ivory Coast
Email: pcdeba@live.fr


Dear Friend,

my name is Miss Precious Deba and am the only surviving
child of my parents who died in one of the mugabe's crazy
land reforms
crises in zimbabwe.

i am contacting you not only because of my sympathetic
situation but also for your advise/help in the management of
an inherited funds worth of us$8.5m(eight million, five
hundred thousand dollars).

the funds in question was deposited with a private security
firm here in abidjan-Ivory coast by my late father.

i decided to leave my country(zimbabwe) for security reasons
as well as to increase my search for a reliable person who
can help me reform my life which is in shambles at the
moment
and having found your contact on the internet business page,
i hope you will not let me down or betray me at the end of
the day.

i am ready to compensate your much needed assistance as we
will agree when i get your nod of acceptance.

i will wait hopefully for your urgent and confidential
response as i assure you that it is a risk free transaction.

regards,

Pecious Deba
please reply to : pcdeba@live.fr


Hey, you misspelled your own name there, Pecious!
And get your shift key fixed, it seems to have an intermittent!

Sunday, September 14, 2008

I Get E-Mail!


Yes, those sentences were THAT short! The guy must have a very narrow monitor! Maybe he typed it on a 22 column VIC-20!

Uk National Lottery Prize
Dave Troutt

Company No. 02949433
SERIAL NUMBER: 5368/02
TICKET NUMBER: 8603775966738
Batch Number: 074/05/ZY369
Ref Number: UK/9420X/05
WINNING NOTIFICATION
We are pleased to inform you of the

final announcement that you are
one
of our beginning of the year winners

of the UNITED KINGDOM ONLINE
PROMO
AWARDS, held on 13 semp , 2008.

You have won for your self
a total sum of £1,200,000 POUNDS

STERLING.

However, no tickets were sold but all

email addresses were assigned to

different ticket numbers for

representation and privacy.The

selection process was carried out

through random selection in our

computerized email selection

machine(TOPAZ) from a database of

over 250,000 email addresses drawn

from all the continents of the world.

Please you are adviced to complete

the form and send it immediately to

our Promotion manager through email

or fax for prompt collection of your

fund from the designated bank.

Fill the below information’s and send

to the fiduciary agent for your
Claims verification:
FILL THE CLAIMS FORM BELOW

AND SEND
TO OUR CLAIMS AGENT FOR

VERIFICATION
1. Full Names:
2. Address:
3. Age:
4. Sex:
5. Marital Status:
6. Occupation:
7. Phone numbers:
8. Country:

Name: Mr. Anord Scotty
e-mail: anordscotty@yahoo.com.hk

Yours Truly,
Co-ordinator(Online Promo

Programme)


Over a million pounds sterling...what's that in REAL money? hahaha, I am joking my friends in the isles! The TOPAZ machine makes its appearance again!
Drawn from ALL the continents of the world? Antarctica, even? Well, people do live there. A few. Scientists. And there are all the penguins!

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

I Get E-Mail!

Honest to goodnes, you use a word like modalities, the meaning of which I do not know, and then throw in things like "there grant" and "passed three year"? Bush league, baby. Get with the program!

COMPLIMENT OF THE DAY...
MRS ZHU YUNING

Good Day,

Let me start by introducing myself. I am Mrs. Zhu Yuning, Am an accountant
in the Fondazione Di Vittorio, established 1977 by the Multi-Million
groups and now supported by United Nations Organization (UNO) and the
European Union (EU), and conceived with the objective of human growth,
educational, and community development thereby uplifting the standard of
living of people. Below is the site.

1.http://www.fondazionedivittorio.it

After further investigation, it was discovered that some of the grant
beneficiary did not claim there grant and this grant funds has been in our
account for the passed three years. So, Seventeen Millions Five Hundred
Thousand United State Dollars is still lying in our account and no one
will ever come forward to claim it. What bothers me most is that according
to the laws of Italians, at the expiration of 4 years the funds will
revert to the ownership of the Italian Government. Against this backdrop,
my suggestion to you is that I will like to transfer the sum of
$17,500,000.usd for the payment of the Grants that was not claim by the
Recipients .

MODALITIES:

I want you to know that I have had everything planned out so that we shall
come out successful. I have an attorney that will prepare the necessary
document that will back you up as the Beneficiary, all that is required
from you at this stage is for you to provide me with your Full Names and
Address so that the attorney can commence his job.

After you have been made the beneficiary, the attorney will also fill in
for claims on your behalf and secure the necessary approval and of
probate in your favor. There is no risk involved at all in this matter,
as we are going to adopt a legalized method and the attorney will prepare
all the necessary documents. Please endeavor to observe utmost discretion
in all matters concerning this issue. Once the funds have been
transferred to your bank account we shall then share in the ratio of 70%
for me, 30% for you.

Should you be interested please send me your,

1, Full names,
2, private phone number,
3, current residential address,

And I will prefer you reach me on my private email address below:
(zhuyuning_02@ozu.es) and finally after that I shall provide you with more
details of this operation.

Your earliest response to this letter will be appreciated.

Kind Regards,
Mrs. Zhu Yuning.

Saturday, August 23, 2008

I Get E-Mail!

Two recent spams with the same subject line. I don't think these are REALLY from PayPal because:
  1. Pay-PaIL.com is where it SAYS it's from.
  2. The Survey link goes to http://www.christiangm.org/Forum/uploads/paypal.com/index.php, not PayPal. The Privacy Policy also links there.
  3. It offers a prize, then it threatens me with deletion. Nice.
What's with the note on the SSL certificate? Woohoo, I'm impressed!


Credit Union: IMPORTANT :PayPal Account Verification
PayPal

Dear Customer,

CONGRATULATIONS !!!

You have been chosen by PayPal online department to take part in our quick and easy reward survey.
In return we will credit 100$ to your account - Just for your time!
Helping us better understand how our customers feel, benefits everyone.
With the information collected we can decide to direct a number of changes to improve and expand our online services.
The information you provide us is all non-sensitive and anonymous - No part of it is handed down to any third party groups.
It will be stored in our secure database for maximum of 3 days while we process the results of this nationwide survey.

We kindly ask you to spare two minutes of your time in taking part with this unique offer!
To continue please click the link below: Customer Satisfaction Survey >>


Copyright © 2008 PayPal, Click on the following link to review or obtain a copy of our
Privacy Policy Statement

If you fail to provide the required information your account will be automatically
deleted from the
PayPal
, Database

Note: We will be upgrading our yearly SSL EncryptedServer to prevent fraudulent
activity.

Reference ID: EEFNQMWJIFGNGWNWPOWONSHFXWZRWGKNLUUT

And the next one. This one links to antiquejewels.org. Can't PayPal afford their own server? Same threat of deletion, but no reward this time.

Credit Union: IMPORTANT :PayPal Account Verification

PayPal


Hello, PayPal, Member August 2008


It has come to our attention that your PayPal account information needs to be updated.
If you could please take 5-10 minutes out of your online experience and update your personal records,
To continue please click the link below: Click here


Thank you for using PayPal!
The PayPal Team

Please do not reply to this email. This mailbox is not monitored and you will not receive a response.
For assistance,log in to your PayPal Account and click thec Help link located in the top right corner

Accounts Management As outlined in our User Agreement, PayPal will periodically send you information about site changes and enhancements.

Copyright © 2008 PayPal, Click on the following link to review or obtain a copy of our
Privacy Policy Statement

If you fail to provide the required information your account will be automatically
deleted from the
PayPal, Database

Note: We will be upgrading our yearly SSL EncryptedServer to prevent fraudulent
activity.

Reference ID: JUPGWXVPIUKZWSFVEINIIWXCBQIWCGTCYSI

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

I Get E-Mail!

This is probably the worstly-written spam I have ever received, considering it is purportedly from the Bank Of Scotland, where one assumes they all speak and write SOME form of the English language. Do not these folks have spell -czech on there machines?

But, it IS shocking to think that poor James Wood, Regional Manager low these 15 years, has NOTHING to show for all his hard work.


It is indeed sad that he must resort to this scam. I am disheartened.

The Manager,
Bank of Scotland Limited,
HBOS Treasury Services,
33,Old Broad Street,
London EC2N 1HZ. Greetings From JAMES WOOD
.
This letter is not intended to cause any form of embarrasments, but ratherintended to contact your highly esteemed self. I am writing to seek
your consent in a private and confidential matter regarding some funds unaccounted for in our bank here in London during the last 2006
business year.I need assistance from a trustworthy and reliable Foreigner whom I will fillin as the beneficiary. Your major role would be to provide either an existing bank account or to set up a new Bank account immediately to receive this money and get 30% of the total funds as commission. There are practically no risks involved, thetransaction will be executed under a legitimate arrangement that will protect us from any breach of the law, it will be simply a bank-to-bank transfer, and all I need from you is to stand claim as the eneficiary (next of kin)so that my head office can order the transfer to your designated bankaccount under few working days.

I am JAMES WOOD, the regional manager of Bank Of Scotland Limited, and I write you this proposal in good faith; I am married with five lovely kids. It is my duty as the regional manager to send in financial report to my head office in the capital city at the end of each business year. On the course of the last year 2006 business report, I discovered the sum of Twentysix million eight hundred and fifty thousand pounds sterlings 26,850,000.00. Thefund is of clean origin. The owner of this account is a foreigner, a program leader.Untill his death. The Late Prime Minister, Mr. Rafik Hariri. I willprovide all necessary information needed in order to claim this money.

Hoppingin God that you will never let me down now and in future. ok! Rafik Bahaa EdineHariri (November 1,1944 - February 14, 2005), was a Lebanese self-made billionaire and business tycoon,and was five times Prime Minister of Lebanon(1992-1998 and 2000-2004) before his last resignation from office on October 20, 2004. The late Rafik Hariri died on February 14, 2005 when explosives equivalent to around 300 kg of C4 were detonated as his motorcade drove past theSaint George Hotel in the Lebanese capital. Our head office is not aware of Funds and will never be aware of it. I have placed this funds on what we call escrow call account with no beneficiary and as an officer of this bank I cannot be directly connected to this money, hence i contacted you. If you accept to work with me I will appreciate it very much as you are the first and the only person I am contacting for this particular transaction. We will start the first transfer with sixteen million
pounds, upon successful transfer without any disappointment from your side, we shall re-apply for the payment of the remaining amount to your account. A this juncture i wish to tell you what prompted me to package this deal.

I have a 9-year old daughter who has leukemia, disease of the blood, and she needs a bone marrow transplant or she will die. I want this transplanting to be done in any good children hospital in your country if there is one. Once this fund is transferred into your account, I shall resign from my job and bring my family to start a new life in your country. I would begrateful if you would help me in looking out for good investment oppurtunities with my own part of the money in a very profitable business. I have worked for this bank for the past 15 years yet I have nothing to show for it, I really need your assistance to secure this fund as soon as possible. as soon as you receive this message if you think we can work together, so that we can go over the details. Send also your Private mobile phone and fax nos: for more proper elaborrations.PLEASE GET BACK TO ME WITH MY PRIVATE EMAIL FOR EASY CONTACT( james50wood@myway.com)
Truly yours,

JAMES WOOD,

Does poor James Wood know that he will have to PAY for that bone marrow treatment, as we do not have socialized medicine in this country?

Well, here's "hoppingin God" that he finds a way to deal with his daughter's health problem, as I can be of NO assistance to him!

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

I Get E-Mail!

The Honorable Beneficiary here humbly submits these four spams, so I can delete from my spam-box!

All caps? What is this, a telegram?


ATTENTION HONORABLE BENEFICIARY
OCEANIC BANK PLC

ATM INTERNATIONAL CREDIT SETTLEMENT
OFFICE OF THE DIRECTOR OF OPERATION
OFFICE OF THE PRESIDENCY
OCEANIC BANK (PLC) OF NIGERIA
ATTENTION HONORABLE BENEFICIARY
THIS IS TO OFFICIALLY INFORM YOU THAT WE HAVE VERIFIED YOUR CONTRACT
INHERITANCE FILE AND FOUND OUT THAT WHY YOU HAVE NOT RECEIVED YOUR PAYMENT IS
BECAUSE YOU HAVE NOT FULFILLED THE OBLIGATIONS GIVEN TO YOU IN RESPECT OF YOUR
CONTRACT/INHERITANCE PAYMENT.
SECONDLY WE HAVE BEEN INFORMED THAT YOU ARE STILL DEALING WITH THE NONE
OFFICIALS IN THE BANK AND YOUR ENTIRE ATTEMPT TO SECURE THE RELEASE OF THE FUND
TO YOU HAS PROVES UNSUCCESSFULLY. WE WISH TO ADVISE YOU THAT SUCH AN ILLEGAL ACT
LIKE THIS HAVE TO STOP IF YOU WISHES TO RECEIVE YOUR PAYMENT SINCE WE HAVE
DECIDED TO BRING A SOLUTION TO YOUR PROBLEM. RIGHT NOW WE HAVE ARRANGED YOUR
PAYMENT THROUGH OUR SWIFT CARD PAYMENT CENTER ASIA PACIFIC THAT IS THE LATEST
INSTRUCTION FROM MR. PRESIDENT, UMARU MUSA YAR'ADUA (GCFR) PRESIDENT
FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA AND FEDERAL MINISTRY OF FINANCE.
THIS CARD CENTER WILL SEND YOU AN ATM CARD WHICH YOU WILL USE TO WITHDRAW YOUR
MONEY IN ANY ATM MACHINE IN ANY PART OF THE WORLD, BUT THE MAXIMUM IS ONE
THOUSAND FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS PER DAY, SO IF YOU LIKE TO RECIEVE YOUR FUND THIS
WAY PLEASE LET US KNOW BY CONTACTING THE CARD PAYMENT CENTER AND ALSO SEND THE
FOLLOWING INFORMATION TO HIM IN ORDER HIM TO PROCEED IMMEDIATELY:
1. FULL NAME
2. PHONE AND FAX NUMBER
3. ADDRESS WERE YOU WANT THEM TO SEND THE ATM CARD TO (P.O BOX NOT ACCEPTABLE)
4. YOUR AGE AND CURRENT OCCUPATION
5. A COPY OF YOUR IDENTIFICATION
HOWEVER, KINDLY FIND BELOW THE CONTACT PERSON AND CONTACT HIM IMMEDIATELY FOR
IMMEDIATE DELIVERY OF YOUR ATM CARD TO YOU AS THE RIGHTFUL CONTRACT
BENEFICIARY, ALSO DO CALL HIM IMMEDIATELY AND LET HIM KNOW THAT YOU HAVE SENT
AN EMAIL TO HIM FOR IMMEDIATE ACTION ON YOUR CONTRACT INHERITANCE OK, SO
CONTACT HIM NOW ALRIGHT:
MR. ANTHONY EKE
DIRECTOR, ATM PAYMENT DEPARTMENT
PHONE NUMBER: +234-802-712-7674
EMAIL: atmcenterx@hotmail.com
THE ATM CARD PAYMENT CENTER HAS BEEN MANDATED TO ISSUE OUT $8,300,000.00 AS
PART PAYMENT FOR THIS FISCAL YEAR 2008. ALSO FOR YOUR INFORMATION, YOU HAVE TO
STOP ANY FURTHER COMMUNICATION WITH ANY OTHER PERSON(S) OR OFFICE(s) TO AVOID
ANY HITCHES IN RECEIVING YOUR ATM PAYMENT.
FOR ORAL DISCUSSION, I CAN BE REACHED ON OR EMAIL ME BACK AS SOON AS YOU
RECEIVE THIS IMPORTANT MESSAGE FOR FURTHER DIRECTION AND ALSO UPDATE ME ON ANY
DEVELOPMENT FROM THE ABOVE MENTIONED OFFICE.
NOTE THAT BECAUSE OF IMPOSTORS, WE HEREBY ISSUED YOU OUR CODE OF CONDUCT, WHICH
IS (ATM-811) SO YOU HAVE TO INDICATE THIS CODE WHEN CONTACTING THE CARD CENTER
BY USING IT AS YOUR SUBJECT.
BEST REGARDS,
BARRISTER ROBERT SCHEEL.

This one may not be a rip-off, I don't know. Are there a lot of people going to Dubai? I saw on Sixty Minutes last Sunday that it IS a tourist destination. Frankly, for me, if I wanted to see desert, I sure as heck wouldn't fly half-way around the world to do it! But why do the links specify port 81 in the URL?

VIP REWARD CARD
Vice Versa

Planning on travelling to Dubai this summer?
header


Shopping with the Vice Versa® reward card
Dubai has gained the reputation of becoming one of the foremost shopping hubs in the world. Vice Versa gives visitors to Dubai the opportunity to earn money while spending money. With the Vice Versa card, you can earn instant Cash-rewards every time you present the card in any of the 275 Partner Outlets in Dubai.

Some of Vice Versa's 275 Partner Outlets* are listed below indicating the reward rate. For a full partner lisitng please visit www.viceversacard.com.

ABS

10%


Dolce & Gabbana

10%


Paul & Shark

10%

Al Washia

12%


Dune

12%


Porsche Design

10%

ALDO

12%


GF Ferre

10%


Prada

10%

Alviero Martini

15%


Giorgio Armani

10%


Raoul

12%

Baldessarini

10%


Greg Norman

15%


Ray Ban

10%

Bally

12%


Gucci

10%


Rocco Barocco

15%

Basler

12%


Guy Laroche

15%


Shanghai Tang

10%

BCBG MAXAZRIA

10%


Hugo Boss

10%


Skechers

12%

Brioni

10%


Just Cavalli

15%


Spring

12%

Burberry

10%


Kenneth Cole

12%


Tommy Hilfiger

12%

Calvin Klein

10%


Lancaster

15%


Vintage 55

15%

Cartier

10%


Laundry

10%


Vogue

10%

Christian Dior

10%


Moreschi

12%


Von Dutch

12%

Coccinelle

10%


Nine West

12%


Zilli

10%

*Most brands are located at several locations in Dubai, including: Mall of the Emirates, Ibn Battuta Mall, Dubai Festival City, Jumeirah Beach Road, Burjuman Center, Bin Hindi Avenue, Deira City Center and Wafi City.

Enjoy the best of the City
Dining in Dubai is an exceptional experience and you can use the Vice Versa card in a wide variety of restaurants. Selected restaurants throughout the city will reward Vice Versa cardholders with up to 20% Card-Cash™.

Make your choice of: Chinese, European, Fusion, Indian, International, Italian, Japanese, Middle Eastern, North American, Pan-Asian, Seafood and Steakhouse or visit any of the great Cafe's situated in the malls.

Vice Versa has selected a variety of leisure activities across Dubai.
Get rewarded at the following activities:

  • Boat Charter (5-10%)
  • Golf (10%)
  • Art (20%)
  • Theatre (10%)
  • Seaplane sightseeing (10%)
  • Big Bus sightseeing (15%)
  • Dubai Dolphinarium (10%)

How to use the Vice Versa Card
Simply present your Vice Versa card every time you go shopping, dining or when booking leisure activities, and you will instantly receive up to 20% of the amount back on your card. Use the Cash-rewards (AED) as payment for your next purchase – for anything, anytime and anywhere with Vice Versa Partner Outlets.

Request your Vice Versa card today and make use of the great VIP privileges during your stay in Dubai.

Vice Versa - the smart way to travel!

For more information about Vice Versa visit www.viceversacard.com


Beware of this next one, the link for the Customer Verification Form isn't exactly as represented, it goes to some weird place in the UK.

Submit Your Bank of America Identity
Bank of America Inc.
...

Dear Bank of America customer,

Security and confidentiality are at the heart of the Bank of America. Your details (and your money) is protected by a number of technologies, including Secure Sockets Layer (SSL) encryption.
We would like to notify you that Bank of America carries out customer details confirmation procedure that is compulsory for all our customers. This procedure is attributed to a routine banking software update.

Please visit our Customer Verification Form using the link below and follow the instructions on the screen.

http://www3.bankofamerica.com/confirmdetails.jsp?referrer=22jdsewzraDadhkznzdeOkhb

Bank of America Customer Service


I like this one, it is something different. The box is in the mail!

LETTER FROM MR. BEN OFOR ABOUT YOUR CONSIGNMENT

Mr. Ben Ofor
.

OFFICE OF MR. BEN OFOR
MANAGER NATIONAL WARE-HOUSE

Attention,

This is to inform you that arrangements have been concluded as regards to the shipment of your consignment of funds to your country.

I choose to conclude it and make sure it is off already before contacting you. I found out that this consignment has been lying here because of non-payment of shipment fees.

This is why I decided to use my connections as the Shipment officer in charge of the National Security warehouse, (This is where all the abandoned consignments in Nigeria are kept at the orders of the Government of Nigeria.)

The consignment left Lagos Nigeria yesterday night en-route your country via London, It is a metal box, silver in color with a weight of about 150kg, the box is declared as containing diplomatic /inheritance documents only.

The name of the Courier Company based in London is Air Courier International Ltd.

Call me immediately so that I can give you the phone and fax numbers of the courier company in Italy so that you confirm when the consignment will arrive.

I choose to do this for you because I studied your file and discovered that you have paid a lot of money before abandoning this consignment and I believe you will compensated me well when you receive the consignment.

Note: I know the content of the Box because I could see the amount you are being owned by the Federal Government.

This is why I decided to get involved. You must also know that this arrangement do not concern all the people you were dealing with in Nigeria before today as this consignment/Payment has been surrendered to the Government, Hence my involvement

This is the contact number of the manager who is the right person to contact (+447031913872) his name is Mr. Mandy Peter; call him as soon as you get this mail today.

I wait for your call or mail.

Thanks
Dr. Ben Ofor